Consent, boundaries and child-on-child harm

Consent is not valid when there is pressure, fear, coercion, confusion, a significant imbalance of power or no real freedom to refuse. In children's homes that imbalance can come from age, status, popularity, threats, group pressure, secrecy, online coercion or a child's particular vulnerability. A child who appears to agree may still have been unsafe.

Boundaries protect everyday life in the home. Bedrooms, bathrooms, teasing, touch, dares, mobile devices and conversations about relationships can all become risky if staff leave children to manage them without clear adult limits. Calm, consistent boundary-setting by staff reduces harm and keeps children safer.

Questions that help staff think safely

• Was there real choice?
• Was there pressure, fear or secrecy?
• Was there a power difference?
• Is this behaviour safe for everyone involved?
• Does the child need protection or specialist help now?

Where there is pressure, fear or imbalance, staff should not assume there was real consent just because no one shouted.